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K BYE, 2020


Superbly thank you for this big year. 2020 is the year while I was much grateful. The year that I've never expected. The year when my life suddenly got easier. The year when I become more confident. The year when I found my favorite things to do. The year when I know what I have to do the next year. The year when I couldn't even see anything live, but I was happy. The year when I shouldn't see my enemies.  The year when I didn't see people who I hate. The year when I didn't run every time I became later. The year when I didn't have to go to other villages, to anywhere I couldn't know. The year when I went on an airplane trice by myself. The year when I suddenly want to cut my hair and stop to pull it out or punch my head.  The year when I decided to stop thinking that I was depressed. The year when my eye was getting inflamed and my foot was getting injured. The year when I couldn't see my phone and laptop too. The year when I've got FOMO, cybersickness, and CVS. The year when I realized that my hobbies were not for sale. The year when I finally had a dream, even I know that the dream maybe won't become true. The year when I decided to stop having social media and I want to delete my Instagram account after all this year. I want to be happy without my friends because someday I may be alone and I should be happy with myself. The year when I really felt tired. I truly wanna quit. The year when I've got bored to hear any word. The year that ruined and changed my whole life.

I was happy when I wrote this. This is the best feeling I've ever had in my life. When I passed 2020. When I felt I became older, stronger, and cooler. When I realize it has been 1 year ago. One year since I came to Jakarta for the first time after 6 years has passed. When the airplane just lands and I checked my phone to see my GPI and goosebumps, I've got 4.00 on the 5th semester! That is the best day ever. When I looked at a Bento restaurant that I have always eaten when I was a kid. When I tried something new. A new ordering system, a new building, a new facility, a new food, a new trend. Everything was new and everything has changed. That moment just made me realized that I need something new. I was happy to saw something different. A good difference. The moment when I came to Christmas celebration and then it became my last Christmas celebration in my 20 years. When I came to a department store with my family to buy a new suit. When I came to a youth event by myself, meet a new friend who I didn't know and realized my status is not suitable for them. I know how to pick a friend now. Not everyone could become our friend. Cause everything depends on money. I learn something new and I was happy to walk in the rest area by myself. Just in the rest area and that made me happy.

Thank you for this amazing year.

I will always remember the best number of the year, 2020.

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